Alone and The Lonely....

This being single business is super overrated!!
I am sick to death of people telling me " oh your so lucky you got out while you were still young and without kids" or "Hey its better to be alone cuz you can do bad all my yourself" and my personal favorite " Now you can enjoy yourself and be free"...
UGH!!!! That stuff is all crap!!
Isn't the point to be in a relationship so that you have a partner? Don't you want to do bad with someone else? Haven't these people heard that Misery Loves Company~ another of my personal favorite cliches. I wanted kids he had one it was great!! I WAS enjoying myself and in the relationship i felt FREE.. Now being a single twenty-something i feel like a sitcom plot. My life had direction when were together..maybe not the direction i wanted..but direction none the less. This drifting shit has to end don't logs usual drift ashore after a while??? I mean even Whales accidentally land and beach themselves....
Am I so stupid to have rather been in a functional state of dysfunction? I am one to enjoy the company of an enemy I know rather than face a new fiestier opponent... Its so hard to be this fucking brave all the time...I am battle weary and I don't even have a clue as to who or what I am fighting!! Its become an epic battle of the super sHeroic purportion to win what? For the longest time I honestly thought I was fighting the "DON'T BECOME YOUR MOTHER" battle... But that ship sailed and sank~ I am some morphed version of her and my father that is what I was always supposed to be I am almost completely ok with this.... So now all of this fervor and to fight what? Whom? Hell how?
The rage that drives my life is a direcitonless band of hyperactivity...
When I reach out to the wise sage friends and family memebers I get advice that is almost as cliched as the relationship stuff: Go to school and consentrait on your studies~ get into law school; Make money - get out there and make your fortune!!; Do what makes you happy follow your life's bliss; Help build the Kingdom of God....... My only question and response to such advice is " I am doing all of this and I am still missing my mate...Now what?"
No one has given me a satisfactory answer...Wait...I am told constantly to wait...But if you have ever met me you would know that I don't know how to wait...I am perfectly fine waiting in lines, I don't freak out at the post office~much~ I can even sit on an airplane for hours on a runway and do my Soduku puzzles perfectly content...But this wait on a man business is more than a patient Christian Buddhist can stand!! I can pray,fast,exercise,meditate, and lay it down at the alter what I can't and am no longer willing to hear is WAIT!! I like action words and the last time I checked the word Wait was not a VERB....A command~ I think it is an Adverb- but not an Action word........
I say all of that to say that I am trusting the Lord to provide and the Universe to reveal who I am and who my Mate is its just a lonely long wait and I need some reinforcements.....
I do still date don't get me wrong I go out, but it is so rare and it's not like when I was first released into the single jungle. I am far more selective in who I share my time and attention and dinner with really... That is not saying that I am only dating the Football players with Ivy League Education 401K and Aston Martin Vanquish in the driveways...I hope those exist in my future but seriously I still go out with the average Video game playing, State College drop outs who drive Toyotas but have nice smiles and great conversation or washboard abs......
I just feel as I move onward and upward into the grown up anti-GLAMOROUS LIFE it would be great to share with someone..I don't want to wait until I am all perfect to get the guy I want to be imperfect with him and go into eachother's pefectly imperfections....Like Mimi sang in Rent I want someone whose baggage maches my own!! boy did she have some baggage.....